Corvette C7 Z06 owners compete in 2015 Deadwood Festival of Bad Taste

 

Unlike the annual Goodwood Festival of Speed that attracts thousands of performance car enthusiasts, any gathering involving Corvette owner crowd amounts to nothing less than a Deadwood Festival of Bad Taste and Bullshit.  Why?  Because in spite of statements coming from +Tadge Juechter and +General Motors claiming appeal of the newest Corvettes to much younger crowd and current owners of various exotic cars, the demographics of the Corvette buyers have not changed a bit with the introduction of the seventh generation of Corvette. 

Yes, the clown pretending to be a competent automotive mover and shaker insists on presenting the newest Corvette generation as a complete departure from the usual geriatric crowd completing their proverbial bucket list and appealing to young and performance oriented buyers but unfortunately the real life continues to disagree with the chief "engineer" of Corvette program. 

On the surface, the waxer crowd prevailing in sales figures may appear as a failure but it really is not.

As a matter of fact, considering not just serious but outright fatal flaws easily found on the newest Corvettes, this is a good thing and nothing illustrates this better than the waxer crowd purchasing the newest Corvette flagship, C7 Z06.

Typically, the waxing crowd disguises its true reason for purchase of Corvette, especially upper end models like Z06 or ZR1 under the pretense of buying a successful performance car, a press award here and there, a collection of successful track competition, outstanding performance figures, a few records and on and on...  99% of these buyers never ever test the performance abilities of these cars but they buy them anyway, just to brag about magazine reviews and exchange newest wax and leather treatment observations.

Unfortunately, this time around, there is really not much  to brag about, in fact, there is so much negative publicity and documented problems with the newest flagship that taking the newest acquistion to the shine and show or cars and coffee events creates a potential for an outright ridicule.

Nevertheless, like the previously mentioned band providing a cheerful sotundtrack to the sinking Titanic,  those who bought the newest flagship proceed to plan B, ignoring all the embarrassment and proceeding with the usual ritual of slapping as much aftermarket junk on the already quite infamous flagship, slapping as much lipstick on the pig as usual.

And this is is where the entertainment starts, as shown below.  Although there are numerous examples of this bad taste rodeo on this blog already, what follows is a mini festival of very ostentatious exhibitionism.

CAUTION: proceed with caution, a permanent damage to visual senses and trauma may occur and professional treatment may be required.

Here is the first contestant.  No, it is not body color matched engine components that earn this proud Z06 owner entry to this festival of horrible taste, it is the LED LIGHTS lighting up the engine compartment decor that do the trick.  One cannot help but wonder what posseses people to commit these visual attrocities.

Here is the second contestant and this one is a good one for sure- straight from the STAR WARS!!!
If the 70's style tire lettering was not bad enough, there is a stormtrooper helmet, along with the rest of the attire in an apparent attempt to fool the masses into believing the newest flagship is really an imperial space vessel? 

The irony of the situation is of course the fact that if anything, the piece of shit flagship resembles more the MILLENUM FALCON and its inability to engage the warp drive when needed most.  Time for this tool to dress up like Han Solo or maybe Chewbacca?

The third contestant, apparently the missing Hertz Edition?  Although Hertz along with other car rental companies routinely rents out the base Corvette (gotta keep those sales figures grow somehow), there is no attempt at all by Hertz to take on the Z06 version of C7.  Seems like Hertz is smart not to deal with the problem and defect prone car, especially since the Hertz version would involve another can of worms, the newest automatic transmission.  The gold anodized rims are right down impressive.  Does anyone still use pinstriping on cars?  LOL.

The fourth contestant, apparently into four wheeling his fine ride, judging after the rental space available between the wheels and the wheel well opening. 

Is this one of the orange peel editions?  Even though the (non functional) fender vent garnish appears to be clad in chrome, the shine is not bright enough to hide the truly awful orange peel.  Hopefully this car delivers on Rubicon Trail though? 

And here is the fifth contestant, competing with what appears to be a Bushwacker Edition of C7 Z06?  Or is this merely a liner for the actual flares that will  go on top of these pieces of plastic that stick out like proverbial sore thumbs and no longer just two up front but matching FOUR.

The fact the front of this car already looks like shit was not enough for this owner who had to complete the visual abortion all around?  Hmmm...

Here is an apparent Nurburgring record holder?  WTF is happening here?  This one is pretty confusing, is this C7R?  or C7 Z06 R and does R stand for RECORD or RICE?   Is this the car that managed to finish the Nurburgring lap in 7:18?  Wow!!!

Oh and why not make sure that idiotic designation can be seen from all angles, this way nobody can miss this stupidity!!!

And how about this matching helmet?  Surely, even out of the car, nobody can miss the Nurburgring distinction, LMAO.

The seventh contestant, this one must be an employee of Pep Boys or Earl Scheib or both (the flagship is not cheap). 

 

 

If the stripes on top of stripes on top of black over silver was not enough, why not ensure complete visual rape and put those fine rims on already visually raped car?

The eight and final contestant is relatively low key, a car belonging to Sharpie Edition of C7 cars.  Why Sharpie?  Because the blue thread formerly was white and changed its color courtesy of blue Sharpie... Hmmm...  On the bright side, this is the cheapest abomination and attrocity committed by the Z06 owner on this list.

So what all of these abominations have in common?  Not a single one was aimed at improving anything even remotely related to PERFORMANCE, nothing else than automotive DEADWOOD.

Now, there is no doubt the list of contestants will continue to grow rapidly and steadily, these are Corvette owners after all.